Fandom [#2]

This is very important.

If you're a tourist, or you have absolutely no idea what to wear on a Friday in sunny South Africa. Then this post is just for you.

First of all, let me start off by saying... Hawaiian-shirt Fridays/Cartoon-imprinted-tie Fridays are a thing of the past. If you wanna look 100% Sefrican [sic: South African] you just gotta get yourself some replica shirts. Preferably soccer jerseys, simply because rugby ones are made out of some thick fabric coz the throw themselves around a lot. So go for a soccer jersey instead. Keeps you nice and cool, plus the fabric is so much lighter.

If you live anywhere inside the Free State border, and are of African or coloured descent, then please read the following carefully: STOP WEARING BLOEMFONTEING CELTIC JERSEYS ON FRIDAYS (or any other day for that matter)! Just stop it. Please. I'm begging you. Please. Pretty please with a cherry on top? :(

Why?

Look around you, everyone is wearing it. Every one. Every one and their mother. From the young and innocent to the old and elderly.

Honestly the way everyone seems to have these shirts, you'd swear they're handed out for free at every street corner.

If you life outside of the Free State and wanna show patronage to the mother land. Go right ahead. Wear it any time you feel like it. Just don't wear it till the green starts fading. Eish.

Now, back to the traditional Sporty Fridays dress code code of conduct:

• If you're gonna wear the Celtic shirt, as an example, make sure that there's a game on over the weekend. And if there is, please wear your shirt proudly and grin at fellow Selesele supporters.



• Don't wear formal shoes "to even things out". It's not working. Especially if you are a manager and are tryin to fit in. Wear sneakers. Not your favourite running shoes. Sneakers.
  


• Unless you work out in the sun the whole day. A peaked cap is not necessary.



• Under no circumstances whatsoever must the jersey be tucked into your pants



• You may not wear a formal belt with your jeans. (Are you listening, Mr Manager?)



• If your team is not playing that particular weekend, and you happen to own more than one replicas, (of different teams obviously) please ensure that you are wearing one that is also worn by the majority. If you don't know anything. Don't wear the replics jersey. Your safety and reputation is important.



• Just because you are wearing the same jersey as some stranger in the street, doesn't give you the right to invade their personal space. I understand your excitement in discovering this new style of dress, but hugging strangers is frowned upon.

Ommitted rules also apply. Use your own descretion.

Thank you.

related: Fandom

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Fandom!

I don't think white people give a damn about our (blacks) sports.

Have you ever seen a white guy (or a person of any other race fo that matter) wearing a soccer [team] replica shirt? Ever? I didn't think so.

And yet you see so many black people trying to be all "intergrated" wearing Blue Bulls/Cheetas/Stormers/whaterver shirts like they have shares in the brand.

Ever notice how the streets get swarmed by people (black, white, yellow) wearing a rugby t-shirts? I mean up to a point where you start to feel like an outcast for wearing normal clothes on the day of Die Groot Wedstryd [The Big Game/Match/Whatever]. Your own black people, look at you funny when you walk by staring, they stare at you like you're still stuck in the 90's.

But whenever a local soccer team plays, all you see are thousands of black people from all over the place wearing soccer shirt replicas. I have never seen even one white person wearing a Celtic jersey or Olando Pirates, Sundowns or whatever. They just don't care.

Why should I bother shouting "Blou Bulle" [Blue Bulls] up and down the streets, when you won't ever hear a person of any other race frollicking all over the place screaming Amabakabaka!! ??

semi-related:fandom #2

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i'm thinking about something. something that i just never even thought i would think about. no idea why.

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Can you beleive?!

Not even 2 hours later... another one

COME ON!!!

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Zulu girls [PaperCut Designs]

Clearly there's some sick, twisted, demented sexual fascination with Zulu girls all accross the interwebs, and it seems since my blog post about seeing them in Joburg, people from all over the world have been visiting my blog for all the wrong reasons.

I'm very sorry to have disappointed you in terms of the content of the post, no it's not about how you can fck Zulu girls, but yes it is about appreciating God's creations. Not about perving over them. But that's your choice, sorry my blog doesn't cater to your need to fap-fap over my writings.

But, seeing as you like them so much Mr Perv, here's a lil something for you to drool over while admiring my creativity all at the same time.

1. 
   bigger version from flickr
   
2. 
   it's biggr on flickr

Have fun!

Check more of my pics over here!

Thanks for visiting my blog anyway... tell your friends about me.

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Women are a very constipated species

It's true.

Check, around 86,5% of all constipation relief ads have women in lead roles, talking how dull their lives used to be before they discovered //insert constipation remedy here//.

They go on and on about how crappy they were feeling (excuse the pun), how they couldn't enjoy themselves, couldn't do anything energy consuming, but since a friend (ironically also a woman) recommended Dulcolex/All Bran Flakes/whatever-you-trust (LOL), they are now able to get on with their lives. Like jump around in the park or walk the dog. Coz quite simply put, you never know when nature might call while you're walking the dog or having a picnic in an isolated park far from restrooms.

So it's best to sort out your digestion issues before having fun. That's my advice. Use it. I insist.

I have no idea why. But come to think of it, most of the girls I know have had some sort of constipatory situation to deal with.

I've had a friend of mine actually go to see a doctor in search of some much needed help. I swear. She had to get prescription meds to get things back to normal. Imagine.

Why some women don't have regular, self-cleaning systems like the rest of us, I'll never know.

The Nnumber 2 seems to be a very illusive concept to these constipated women.

Same applies to number 1. You have no idea how many girls/women I know who (at any given point in their lives) have had a bladder infection of some sort. Either that or a yeast infection. It's sad really.

I know this isn't something to joke about. And some people out there (it may be you or somebody you might know) are seriously suffering from the consequences of eating the wrong foods (i.e. foods without any fibre) or just plain laziness to go to the loo.

Though the latter is arguably not an illness of any kind. It's just plain stupidity. In fact, I know of two people; The first one hates going to pee (political correctness is imperative) because it involves the tideous task of taking her pants off, pulling down the undergarment, then sitting on a cold seat then pulling her pants a few (short) minutes later. This is for a number one btw. (As if a quickie is any different) Some people.

Then the other one... goes for a number 2 only after 2-3 days. Simply because she's lazy. And these are her words, and I quote: "I'm just lazy to [read: poop]." close quote. Then the toilet is left smelling like a sewage pipe burst, and she jokes about it. WTF is that about. Some people...

See.

It's laziness.

Next thing they get all infected and miserable and expect sympathy from us (men).

Come on. Do the right thing. Go to the loo every once in a while. It's for your own good.

You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear a woman proudly say:
"I'm human too, I go to the toilet just like you"

Look on the bright side... at least she goes. :P

I sure hope so...

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There are two things involved

Well let me tell you this...

You see in life, there are two things involved.
It's either you are a man, or you are a woman.

If you are a woman, you are safe.
If you are a man, there are two things involved...

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Black people fascinate me

Why are black people so obsessed with labels then claim to be "style conscious"? What's that about?

I swear, for as long as people have been designing things and putting their name on it, black people have been the highest consumers of it.

Nevermind if something looks completely crappy, if it's got a famous name on it, rest asured some black person out there can't wait to spend their borrowed money on it and make sure everyone know it's an Ed Hardy original. Do you even know who the hell Ed Hardy is? I do. And I don't own even one Ed Hardy original, simply because I don't actually care much about what the label says, I'm more concerned about whether I like it or not. Whether I look good in it.

I mean look at all these rappers that are all over our TV screens on a daily. You'll rarely see one just wearing your average clothes and not mentioning what brand it is and how much it cost him. e.g. The Luis Voiton Don himself. Okay, maybe it's their way of bragging about what they've achieved with their God-given talents. What's your excuse?

For some odd reason advertising and the media have been feeding us with the notion that wearing a designer label makes you "hot". Well, maybe it does. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe they're just trying to use the media to popularise their brand so that they can make money. No, wait... isn't that exactly what advertising is all about?

This has gotten so far out of hand that people look at you differently if you're not going with the latest trends, the latest and most expensive brand out the at the moment.

If for some reason you're not driving a car with a recognisable brand then forget about getting that girl you keep running into at the post office. She'd rather die than be seen in your trusted Picanto. Doesn't matter if you're probably the guy she's been looking for her whole life (personality & character wise), all that matters is that you're not driving the "right" car. The "right" guy drives an X6, Q7 or at least a Porsche. You know, that guy who always has a different girl in the front seat. Yeah, that's the guy she'd rather be seen with. Not you Mr. Picanto. No... no... no... ala Amy Winehouse!

It is for this very reason that you find so many of our black brothers are so deep in debt, they can hardly afford themselves. They're more concerned about what the Joneses are up to. You'll rarely see a black guy spending money on what they want to spend money on. In fact, I don't even think they know what they want.
This is true for almost everything. Culture, religion, language, who they socialise with, how they socialise with those people. It's all about what the next person's gonna think. It's never about them first then them later.

Black people are just weird like that. I don't get it.

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So hundreds... okay maybe not hundreds... or celebrities are flocking to historically-impoverished Mother-Africa year in and year out to provide aid to the needy. There's nothing wrong with that, we really appreciate it.

But how many people were in desperate need of aid during the hurricanes in New Orleans? Tens of thousands. And yet very little was done to help them out in any way, the little that was done is nothing compared to the kind or charity that some African countries receive from USAID, UN and the likes.

How come you never hear of a documentary outlining the most porverty stricken areas in the United States? For some reason the media seem to be focusing too much on what Paris Hilton is up to instead of concentrating on what the average American struggles with. For some of us who are overly exposed to American glam lifestyles to a point where we were shocked to see our black brothers and sisters' homes wash away in the tragedy that was Hurricane Katrina. The whole thing lasted only a few weeks on our TV screens before we were blessed with yet another shot of yet another celebrity adopting a foreign child. How come none of these 'celebrities' cared enough about their fellow Americans to try help them out with food and other essentials?

Considering that black American are a minority in the US, I guess there was no way things could've played out any differently. There was just no way GW could've send more people to go help out the poor minority groups stranded atop their houses.

Tinstead of focusing on getting them help, they instead focused on how "ungreatful" they were being for the very little help they were getting and therefore "looting".

Wouldn't you loot, if you didn't have the loot?

Anyways, this is not what this is about...

This is about this:

How come poor people seem to only be potrayed in gangsta-shoot-em-up kinda movies? Either that or some stupid comedy about how much black people love chicken. Why can't we learn anything from America? And yet, Oprah shows some footage about how some black walk for 10 miles just to get to school, and everybody is suddenly in tears and wanting to come to "THE MOTHERLAND" and help out. Again, I'm not saying we don't need your help. We do. But I'm of the opinion that there are people Black, Yellow, Green, Indian, Purple whatever, that are also in serious need of your generosity. What about them?

And why the focus on Africa so much? Do you have any idea the kind of living conditions some Asian countries are living under? Try to look past the 800 million people walking up and down the big city lights in China, look at the way they live in the slums. No wonder some Asian cities have resorted to being sex-tourist attractions. And a majority of "tourists" that frequent those countries are American. Meaning they're making a lucrative business out of other peoples' unfortunate situations.

Considering the number of expats living in the US, I doubt they're all living the high life complete with all the glitz and glamour that comes with proudly annoucning "I live in America now" when meeting with old friends back home. I doubt their lifestyles have changed much. Granted they may have lost their original accents, and probably dream in English now, but I doubt the average American living in the US is any better than I am here in Africa.

This is based simply on the fact that I refuse to beleive everyone in the US is "well off".

I'm pretty sure they go through the same day-to-day struggles we go through.

All I'm saying is, show us the poor people in the US, show us how they live, maybe they need aid muh more than we do.

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Hello "Caller"!

WTF!?!

What the hell's the point of callin into talkshows and radio stations and insist on remaining anonymous?

I mean really now... by simply calling into the damn thing makes you anonymous. You can tell them your name's Joseph and they wouldn't give a dime or a damn. I don't even know why these talkshow people bother asking people's names. What do they do with those names? Nohing. That's what. Absolute nothing. Zilch zero nada niks fokol! The don't even say your name more than once after you tell them (unless is to shut you up coz you keep going on and on about something you don't know shit about but just ramble on about it regardless... eish!) anyway... where was I?

Oh, yah... names. What's the point of being anonymous where there's a chance that even if your name happens to be Lerato from Bloemfontein. Do you have any idea how many Lerato's there are in Bloem? Don't just sit there... do you? I'll tell you... A HELLUVA LOT! That's how many. And you think you're protecting your identity by opting to remain anonymous over the phone in disregarding that the show has millions of listeners... shame. Poor you.

I fail to understand how people's brains work sometimes...

Shout-out to Anonymous from Kimberly. I don't blame you dude, with you guys being the poorest province there is that risk of somebody recognising your voice and of course your name. Just in case your name is Alistair or something... God only knows ho many of you guys are out there... say... 20-ish.

LOL

sorry...

I'm bored.

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1 Wish

Before even clicking on 'Create post' I had already written the final words of this post. Is that normal?

Anyways...

1 Wish.

I wish I lived in a country where we didn't have to wait for international artists to grace our shores before we can actually enjoy some good music. I wish we had more local shows you'd sell your sister to go watch. I wish South Africa was a priority when they plan their "World Tours". I wish we got more music in our stores music stores, that we didn't have to wait six weeks to get 340ml's latest album from the supplier or another branch. I wish there was a music store that sells strictly international music, and by international I don't mean American. For some reason, when someone mentions 'international', people immediately think American. I wish they didn't. I wish they didn't have a corner that's marked 'Other' in the music store close to where I live. I get my musc from that corner. I wish I had a broader scope to choose from apart from all this commercialised music. I wish South African musicians would stop making crappy music and expect us to buy it simply because they said 'support local music' at the end of their textbook interviews. I wish we had less commercialised music. House music in particular. Not all of us want commercialised music. Some of us just want music. I wish South African musicians would stop trying to be "international". No one's buying your CD in the US. I don't even think expats are buying your CD. We're the ones subjected to your endless yappings about being "niggas who aint ready fo yo shit". Guess what? If that's the shit we're supposed to be ready for, I'm never gonna be ready. I wish we had musicians who spoke truth to power. Not these people who are just trying to make a quick buck. Why do we have to hold on to every last word spoken by the likes of Tupac, Erykah Badu, Common, Talib Kweli, AD, Slum Village, MosDef, and The Roots? Why can't we have our own messages in song? For some reason, our music only focuses on one portion of music; the partying side of things. We can't party all the time. What happened to the messages. Messages to uplift us.

How come no one in South Africa makes real music anymore? Music is being made
simply because the contract you signed said you have to keep releasing albums for the next 3 years. Even if your content is the same, just as long as you release something. I wish I had more music. I wish I had an iPod. I wish I had better earphones.

All I wish for is music.

Music speaks to me. Music relaxes me. Music excites me. Music fills the spaces in between. Music makes me wanna get up and dance. Music makes me wanna sit down and listen. Music allows me to be. Music comforts me. Music is my friend. Music can never turn on me. Music will never talk about me behind my back. Music is honest. Music is real. Music is escapism in it's truest form. Music is life. I can't imagine a day without music.

Even though they claim that some music makes people kill people. Music doesn't kill people; people kill people! How come you've never heard of someone having done anything positive and it being blamed on music? People have had tons of babies off Barry White's music. That's all you'll ever hear. That people made babies to his music. In South Africa, gospel (after traditional music) is the most popular type of music, the most produced and the most purchased (also the most repetitive, but that's a story for a nother day). And yet, no one does a good thing and blames it on the music.

My one wish is music.

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PaperCut Designs

Designed these from pics I found on the net. Reproduce or use them in any way. I WILL be suing your ass. I will track you down, trust me.

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Development gets Arrested in SA!

One of the greatest HipHop bands (How do you spell HipHop? Is it Hip-Hop or Hip Hop? anyway) to ever put sound on wax, is set to perform in South Africa this month.

Oh hell yes!!

Arrested Development is coming to the Mother Land (they're also going to be in the Mother City) for the second time only in 14 years. (Do the math, last time they were here was in '94 after Mandela's inauguration.) And somewhere in between there, having faught a losing battle with a popular TV series for having used a name simillar to theirs, it's good to see them not having lost their heads.

Having gone from 19 members to 8 kinda makes me wonder if their music is still the same. I guess having 4 new members team up with 4 original members (especially Speech, the lead vocalist) definately strikes a clear balance between the old architects of HipHop and the new kids on the block.

With classics like Everyday People, Mr Windal and Revolution! it promises to be a surefire head-banger for the conscious rhythm and poetry fan. Staying true to the original art form, it'll be rewarding to see people with something worthwhile performing live. After seeing the likes of Snoop and JaRule on SA stages. It's time for something fresh. It's time for the revolution.

• Official site


• Wiki


• Arrested Devlopment, the TV series

Baseline info: Friday, 10 October 2008
Arrested Development South Africa Tour
Live At Bassline Doors
opens @ 20:00pm
Show starts @ 21:00pm
Tickets @ the door: R200Tickets
@ computicket: R220

Cape Town info: Saturday, 11 October 2008
Arrested Development South Africa Tour
Club Galaxy/West End, Cine
400, College Rd, Rylands7764, Cape Town, South Africa (MAP)
Doors open 8pm
Cost:R160.00

These event organising people should start paying me!

Still. If you go and I don't. You know what to do... email me teh pics: papercut[at]brainstormdesigns.co.za

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