Is radio ready?

So on Saturday I went for auditions.

Apparently there was a Top Jock radio talent search thing happening in Mpumalanga for the past couple weeks (I say couple because I think it's actually two). And I only found out about in last Friday while on Facebook.

I woke up nice and early on Saturday with one goal in mind. To see what I can get up to behind a microphone...

They had said the thing would start at 9am sharp. But it started a few minutes after ten.

No worries though, as they were still trying to work on a proper way of giving people they shot in the makeshift booth.
The queue grew shorter and shorter. As people were being given their marching orders and other were celebrating the nods they got. My chance to climb on stage came.

I could feel my heart in my throat. But I couldn't afford that. For me to live through this, my throat was the one thing I needed more than anything.

So I got in the booth. Put the headphones on.

And after correcting the MC a few times, he couldn't pronounce my name properly, Everything went silent as everyone waited to hear what I would deliver.

While waiting in line, all I was doing was going through what I'd say when in the booth. We were given only 30 seconds and you had to say your name, where you're from and your favourite band.

As expected, a lot of people abided to this format, and some started talking about where they attended high school. But I had my gameface on and played along with everyone else who kept saying they didn't know what to say.

While in the meantime I had everything planned out...

I was gonna start the whole thing off by saying what time it was (nobody else did this, before or after me), then say what they radio station was and what song I was gonna play next (even though I didn't actually play a song.
What I tried to do was basically act like I was already hosting a show and the people were only hearing a short snippet.

It went pretty well. I was gonna record it, but then realised that that might distract me.

So I climbed up into the booth, and basically went

Good morning Riverside, my name is Mxolisi Mkhonza on your favourite
station 94.3 MpowerFM (I admit I almost said Metro - and one of the judges heard
me). The time now is 10:55 (although it was actually 10:50 at the time) and
we're about to have the news in a few minutes, but before that though, I wanna
play you one of my favourite bands, 340ml with a song called Hang On To
Yourself. Coz at times like these, all you can do is hang on to yourself.
Let's do this!

(then took the headphones off coz I was done)

I didn't want anyone telling me that time was up or anything to disrupt my flow. So I had to stop myself before I got stopped.

After that I had to hear what the judges had to say. There were three people. The station manager from MpowerFM; next to him some singer guy; and next to her, some lady from Vodacom, the main sponsor.

The station manager person was first to go. He basically said no. I didn't hear what his reasons were and I didn't care.

After him, came the singer guy's turn. He said that I should learn to control my nerves coz they got the better of me, but it was a yes from him.

Last to go was the Vodacom lady, she also said the nerves were an issue, but overall the audition was great and that she could see that I came well prepared... a yes from her too.

Truth is, the only real preparation was the lines I was rehearsing in my head. Apart from that. Everything else has pretty much been a work in progress my whole life.

Imagine, first time behind a mic and I beat people who had cut several demos and sent them through to various radio stations. For me that was all I needed.

I didn't go to these auditions to become the next big thing. I went to prove to myself that I can do it. And I'm glad to say I didn't disapoint myself. I did damn good even if I only got through up to the second round.

Second round was a complete waste of time. The judges didn't have any solid questions or anything. They were just asking people about what they're wearing and questions like "what do you like about South Africa?" (rat bastards).

And then there were other people who got asked questions like "Why do you wanna work for Mpower?" and "What can you tell us about Mpower?".

That made it pretty obvious that the judges had favourites. And were just passing the time with the rest of us.

I got asked a pretty lame question. The station manager guy asked me the significance of the t-shirt I was wearing. (I was wearing my 013 Mpumalanga tee).

I told him about it. And wasted som tim on stage asking them if they had more questions.

To be honest, if I had been picked as one of the five finalists, I would have gracefully declined. I don't see myself working for a radio station I'll never listen to.

I went there for the experience. Just one more thing to tick off my list.

I'm not in they target audience age bracket. They play adult-contemporary music. That's not me.

I'm more urban-contemporary. Not adult.

Adult basically means it's people ranging from 40-grave.

That's not me.

But thanks for the oportunity Mpower. Maybe if some other radio station does a DJ search, I'll apply. Not you. Or maybe you, but in the next 10 years or so.

:)

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