Cool money

Apparently, there's a guy in Joburg, who while working at a construction site, stumbled upon a cooler box. And being the black guy he is. And also taking into account the fact that there are always bombs being tucked away 6 metres underground in cooler boxes, he didn't wanna take any chances.

He very immediately alerted his nearest police station. Upon arrival the cops, (note: THE COPS, not the bomb squad) opened the cooler box, only to find... 1.5 million rand. In R50 and R20 notes.

Imagine how dumb this idiot must feel. I'd fucking kill myself. I'd stab myself with a sharp object on the spot.

I mean, what are the chances that there's a massive bomb terrorist going around burrying bombs 6 metres into the earth in case some construction worker can accidentally detonate the thing and blow him to threads? Who would go through the trouble of making a bomb, only to plant it in some obscure location in hopes that it'll blow some random stranger(s) up?

That's dumb.

So what's in it for this dude? Let's see...

First off, he's already gotten enough mention (even if they're keeping him anonymous because of the utter embarrassment he'd face) all over the radio stations, news papers and online. But let's look at what happened first.

He found the money, called the cops to come open a cooler box for him, then what did he get immediately after that? That's right, a thank you. And probably a pat on the back to sweeten the deal. I mean, it's not like the cops were looking for a blue and white cooler box with undisclosed contents in exchange for a big reward?? It's not like he helped the community in any way by removing the potentially catastrophic coller box bomb off the streets and thereby making his working environment a safer place for all?! Great man!!

Imagine his popularity at home now? I'm sure the wife's pissed as hell everytime she sees him.

Like "You fucking idiot, hnow we gonna have tea without milk!"; "Great, now the bread is finished! Useless idiot!"; "Wonderful, we're having chicken again today!"

He could've done anything in the world. He chose to be the good guy who does the right thing.

I'd fucking kill myself, I swear. I'd actively go out looking for a goddamn bomb and blow myself up. I'd even make one, if push came to shove.

Seriously, he's gonna feel like crap everytime he doesn't have money for anything.

He's a fucking construction worker! He finds a cooler box. Why didn't he at least think that it might contain some beer or food or something else other than a stupid bomb. I don't understand. Even if it were, what are the chances that HE's the lucky bastard to find a bomb burried in the ground?

I doubt the Mayor of the town will actually give him some money as a token of appreciation. He'll probaby get a key to the city and that's about it. What do you need a key for? It's not like there's a place where only people with keys hang out and laugh at all the other idiots without keys; and now you have full access to that area?! I seriously doubt that. Even if he/she does give him smoney, it sure as hell wont be R1.5m.

Imagine what he could've done with all that money?

He could've very nicely told his stuck up boss to go to the nearest hell. Fed his family for yeeeears. Upgraded his life as whole basically.

I doubt he would've gone to school to learn something to make that R1.5m grow. He probably would be dead in two weeks. You know how black people always wanna show off? After buying a round of drinks for everyone at the local drinking hole. He would have proudly made an announcement that he;s now a millionnaire and no-one can touch him. Only to turn up two weeks later with 148 stab wounds. Talk about being untouchable.

I guess it's a good thing he did.

Good for you guy, you're a good South African citizen. That's the spirit. Trust the cops to open a cooler box for you simply because they're wearing a uniform. That doesn't make them less immune to getting blown up. And you were probably not too far from the box when it was opened, so you were gonna get fucked up anyway.

Shit.

Now he's stuck doing construction for years to come. He wont quit his job, every site he goes to, he'll be opening up shit. In hopes it'll have even a ten rand note in there.

Not gonna happen. Ever.

You stayed up all night praying to God to help you with your financial status, and when He does, you hand it over to the cops? He's not making that mistake again. Trust me.

//article

*edit: that's not him in the pics.